”As we understand things, the region is doing well. Unless you count Syria, Egypt, and Lebanon, of course,” added Little.
The political move has been described by legal scholars and social pundits as “bold” and “representative of a more welcoming America.”
When asked if the GOP would ever consider impeaching Obama’s white half, Yoho laughed. “Let’s not get crazy here. We can’t have a black man running this country.”
“That was not the start we had hoped for,” said John Kerry, who led the charge toward peace talks between the two sides. “I really had high hopes for this round of discussions, but alas, they went to shit as usual.”
“I want this to connect with the audience,” said Snyder, “albeit a very specific audience. But an audience nonetheless.”
I’ll probably bomb the shit out of it, get rejected from every school under the sun except for Florida’s unaccredited ones – I’m looking at you, Law and Order Binge-Watching Institute of Orlando — then start my own practice,” Zimmerman said with pride.
“And I’m not just talking NSA blueprints,” Greenwald continued. “I’m talking embarrassing, egg-on-your-face-type shit. Like hacking King Jong Un’s Pinterest account. Or stealing Putin’s famous gingerbread recipe. Or – okay, I should stop talking now,” Greenwald said. “You wanna go ahead and delete the last 30 seconds of tape?”
The stadium, as Sopko explained, will house NFL’s newest franchise: The Afghanistan Bulls. “President Karzai’s a huge Michael Jordan fan,” said Sopko. “Huge.”